:: Dnubirom .....reverof dna dne eht tilnu won ::

:: Thursday, January 08, 2004 ::

i'm supposed to run some errands and buy some things right now... but i'm forcing myself to blog... well... i dont' need to... but here's what's bothering me... school/... yup ... school... my tolerance for it has vastly lessened since Junior year... well... more like 8th Grade Algebra... cuz that's when i would listen on the radio to Cher's Do you Believe song night after night... sleeping in the afternoon, waking up and doing HW, then back to sleep... then school... and i've been doin' the wakin' up at night to do HW routine since then... Senior year is the Senioritis year... i did not do most of my HW and i still passed my classes with A's and B's... and the simplest of all classes English with a C... i really should've gotten an F... heck... but yeah, vvhatever... i didn't wanna go to UCI cuz it was stereotyped as the Asian school... i guess i'm not racist... i'm just becoming more intolerable to stereotyping... i dont' wanna be... but it is affecting my decisions... then CSULB... there was no FILM major... only Theatre Arts major... so, ignorantly, i applied as the T.A.... whelps... it doesn't really matter right?... i could just change it... but then stories of my sister saying parking is a bi0tch... and my classes r 5 dayz of the week, with early morning classes... then a long anal break until the 5 o'clock afternoon class... sure i could've dropped the afternoon one and stuck to the morning classes... but then i wouldn't have freakin' minimum of 12 units that r required... nor the insurance benefit discounts car thingy that my parents would receive... AND... just cuz i didn't do well on my English assessment... i can't get into most classes that I WANT to learn... CASE IN POINT: PSYCHOLOGY... i was very limited to my class choices... sooo y not take up the offer my mom gave me and go to a Pharmacy Tech. SChool... get an associates... school for 7 months.... 5 dayz a week... 7-2... only 2 dayz off per holiday... granted i could become a psychologist person with all the drug work and knowledge i would receive... but damn... WTFreak... and my mom's idea was... CSULB in the morning... and then the pharmacy class in the afternoon... i didn't do HW in senior year... what makes me go to class all day and HW all night now... well... drop the CSULB... don't even apply for that break form... where i can still be registered for CSULB and not go to school for a semester or 2... nahhh... i'll stick to the pharmacy... finish classes in 7 months... and get a job... don't even go back to CSULB.... blah blah blah... the school... was kewl and friendly and fun... a lil technology absent... but it's a learning experience... 2nd youngest in the class age ranging from 17 - 46... but freakin' A... honestly... i felt deprived from thy friends... sure i was making friends with a 24 yr. old guy who smokes and says his son who just started Kindergarten is already gettin' the girls... and would like his son to let daddy try them before blah blah ablha.. .and wink wink pshheness and all that.... and then there's the yeah... okokok too many to name... i'll remember them... anyway... at least when i started HS... i knew people from my school... i had someone to talk to during break and lunchtime... wasn't wondering around the campus alone... i had friends who were lost with me... CSULB... heck i knew a lot of people going there too... i even got a class with Randy... but then CSULB... nah... and then the Pharmacy... it's not really my thing... i dont' wanna go medical like most of my other family members... my mom did say i'm the oddball, unique one... *sigh... but dammit... (i hate competition)... film... i'd still like to do it... but i can't take criticism... and i shouldn't even bother takin' it cuz it will always come... hahaha... as always... want the good without the bad... but i know it's there... right there dammit... well, stopped pharmacy school after 2 weeks... and by then school has started everywhere... and the first few weeks of my extended vaca... i was pleased... wakin' up, doin' physical activities, reading more(even if it's not academically enhancing)... but by October... it's like summer again... just lazy anal bum... and right now... still am... i should be buying that burner before the store closes... and lend Edward the PCN tape he requested... i have it ready too... all i gotta do is get shoes, wallet, keys and drive... but nah... let's go online and type this out... and i was reluctant to type this too... y?... too lazy to type... i'm all thinking... when i go back to school... i'll be like... WTF??? PEN AND PAPER?... what happened to keyboard and moniter... cuz shooooot... i've always had bad handwriting like others have said... but now, i cna't even read it... so uh oh... now what... now i'm goin' to LBCC... i want to play vid games still... finish those vids... which i have to start over now... 2 classes fur sore... 2 classes waiting list... i always ask for more time... and when i get it... i think i'll have enough time in the end... and this is the end of my vaca... and i still say i didn't have enough time... and it's not true... it all somewhat wasted away... i know the problem... i know the solution... doing it is the problem... petty excuses is enough for me not to do it... what a bum... LBCC... i dont' even know anyone who r taking classes with me... they're all a semester ahead... oh vvell... some people take things too seriously and NEED to loosen up... i've learned it and i applied it well for a time... now it's a BAD habit...
money sux... i want to buy stuff... which i want now... maybe need?... debatable... but then through time... i look back... i didn't really need that item, product, accessory... *sigh... i still want stuff... i dont' know now... thinignkngi thinking thinking... ummm growing up sux... i'm a TARGET kid... can'ti just sleep... and f---... i thought God helps the helpless not "those who help themselves." this is bullshItzer


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 3:57 PM [+] ::
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