:: Dnubirom .....reverof dna dne eht tilnu won ::

:: Wednesday, June 29, 2005 ::

in vvhatever news... saw
Jullien, Andrew's cousin... vlad?... and michael bradley... ha, he did recognize me

and i hate things...
everything

also,
i think i lost my other BATMAN beanie in my car

i want to do something, but i can't bring myself to do it...


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 11:49 PM [+] ::
...

heh,
entiresting, very
i just remembered i had a dream
and it felt good
*punches glass repeatedly


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 3:08 PM [+] ::
...

"Aim for success not perfection... Remember that fear always lurks behind perfectionism. Confronting your fears and allowing yourself the right to be human can, paradoxically, make you a far happier and more productive person."
- Dr. David Burns


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 11:46 PM [+] ::
...

There once was a Shogun who had three warrior sons. The Shogun was preparing to leave his kingdom to one of his sons. But the Shogun could not decide which warrior son to level his power and wealth to, so he created a test.

The Shogun had one of his bravest Samurai's stand behind a door and perch a watermelon on the top of the door. When his sons walked through the door the watermelon would fall on their heads and while distracted the brave Samurai would attack and test the skills of the sons. The greatest and bravest swordsman would have the old Shoguns riches.

The old Shogun summoned his first son. As the young man stepped through the door the watermelon started to fall and the Shogun's son turned swiftly and in a flash drew his sword and sliced the watermelon in half. The brave Samurai behind the door attacked with great ferocity. The Shogun's son, with little effort, disarmed the brave Samurai and held him to the floor until his father said, "very good my brave son you have done well and should be proud."

The old Shogun summoned his second son and the brave samurai positioned a new watermelon and hid behind the door. As the son started to push the door open he stopped before the watermelon fell. Taking his sword out he pushed the watermelon to the floor and quickly stepped around the door putting his sword to the hiding brave samurai's throat. His father was most impressed with his son's skill and expertise.

Again the Shogun summoned the last son as the brave samurai prepared the watermelon and hid behind the door. When the son arrived outside the door he stopped and said, "You, behind the door. Come out from your hiding where I can see you. I am a highly skilled swordsman and do not wish to harm you." The brave young samurai stepped out and waited for the son to push the door open so the watermelon would fall on his head when the son asked calmly and clearly, "and please remove the trap from a top of the door."

The old Shogun was most pleased and presented his last son with the prize. "The object of becoming a great swordsman is to heighten ones awareness so as not to have to draw the sword and thus preserve life. You are truly a great martial artist."

just like the movie Hero.
that is so kewl the max


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 1:34 PM [+] ::
...

F--- THIS WORLD AND EVERYTHING IN IT!!!
ha!!!


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 7:12 PM [+] ::
...

saw brandy and krystal at Target, i avoided them ... haha... i dislike those awkward staring-at-each-other-do-i-know-you? faces...
o and A. Rod and Jorge's friend from Psych 10? is in my Hist. 10 class... that's kewl even though we never acknowledged each other...
what am i gonna say? small talk?... bah! vvhatever the freak ever
purpose? i wish i knew what it was already so i can just start doing it... true, there r things that i want to do and such, and maybe that's my purpose, but i want to know it'll mean something... i don't want it for nothing that means nothing to me... o sure, divert my thinking into something positive... sure, it's positive, but is it something i like/want? (was that too selfish? mah bad)
i'm not taking anything personal, but i do...
i'm writing in here too much... too many blah blah blah blahs...

i'm self-loathing again...
u may think "how pitiful", but is that helping me? no...
and if u do try and help, and i give u the cold shoulder and say "no, thanks", or "i don't need it", should u be insulted? well, mah bad for pushing u away, but at least u tried and MAYBE u shouldn't stop trying despite what may result for bad or for worse...
who says what is more important than what is said

my back hurts

friends fade... away
memories r forever... as long as u remember
i dont' know where i'm getting at... so i'm just going to sleep ;-D


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 2:34 AM [+] ::
...

saw that English teacher at SJES... she took over the subject english and 7th home room when Mrs. Eno taught us Algebra people... she's also the one that raised her hand that it's o k to allow responsible kids to bring guns to school... (haha, hey, it helped win that mock trial)
also saw the Wrights - the brother... and my mom is debating whether that was their mom, and i didnt' really get a good look at her... vvhatever the freak ever... they're still tall... but not so much "whoa" tall anymore... vvhatever the freak ever...


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 10:43 AM [+] ::
...

first off, i saw Danielle (sorry i forgot ur name)
that was a pleasure to see
ya'know, i'm never going to watch a movie alone again
What's worse than being lonesome in an empty room?
Being lonesome in a crowded room...

and the line people Jamie, Dennis, and Cory ...???
nice talkin' to ya...

BATMAN BEGINS was GREAT!!!
...just not orgasm/ectstacy great

*WARNING*
the following is not really a spoiler,
but i do hint to some things...

bad:
- insufficient character development (Spider-Man movies' strong point was this & especially in the second one... i cried in the second one!);
- no psychological feeling (not like previous Christopher Nolan's movies: Insomnia & Memento);
- Goyer's humor - i just dont' find all of it amusing (watch the Blade trilogies);
- that pimple/mole/lump on Christian Bale's ridge of a nose (gah so annoying!!!)
- film noir? film not! (not really crime boss mafia related... he's the dark knight DETECTIVE, and he didn't DETECT as much as i wanted him to... well he interrogated, but not much work in the lab area analyzing/examining evidence... oh vvell)

good:
- katie holmes did not suck (although it would've been kewl if she died in a kewl way or some sort of twist involves with her);
- it was made as realistic as possible (even if one scene gave BATMAN a double chin)
- that small twist;
- as much as i don't want that enemy in the very end, it was a very satisfying, awe-inspiring touch nonetheless
*GASP with gaping mouth >-<

overall, i know i'm overly critical, relating it to the current graphic novels i own. i know BATMAN has many different tones in its origin story. i just need to accept this one. it's another BATMAN tale in another BATMAN timeline... that's all
did it ruin the movie???
not too much, not too much at all ^_^

everybody's a critic, eh? :-P

moving on from Tsinoitcefrep .....gnihton ro lla,
or attempting to...


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 3:55 AM [+] ::
...

Which Star Wars Jedi/Sith are you? Obi-Wan Kenobi You’ve managed to train both a great evil and a greater good, not to mention whipping the ass of the coolest looking Sith in the series. However, you do have a few weaknesses, like Count Dooku and a douche bag of a Padawan. Other than that, you are the epitome of class. The accent, the outfit, and your care for those around you is highly admirable. Arguably, you are the best Jedi that ever lived, having owned Maul, Anakin and Grievous, a total of seven lightsabres among the three.

Click Here to Take This Quiz Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 12:43 PM [+] ::
...

is the positive thinking wearing out?

or is it denial?

or am i not thinking positively?


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 11:51 PM [+] ::
...

...but i don't ask for much

am i just a child?
taking little acts... personally


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 11:50 PM [+] ::
...

last september, i had the MY FIRST TIME post
now her's the MY LAST TIME post:

LAST person i drove home: Amanda
LAST Male person I drove home: Jerry
LAST Long drive i had: Going to Cathedral City
LAST Long drive i had and made it back home: Barstow
LAST time i filled my gas tank: monday; june 6th
LAST time i cleaned the inside of my car: last month
LAST time i cleaned the outside of my car: months ago
LAST time my car was cleaned on the outside: saturday; june 4th
LAST non-family members that saw my car: Dominic & Nychel
LAST family member to drive my car: dad
LAST family member to drive my car and has a funny story to go with hit: sister
LAST family member to ride in the passenger seat: Kevin

i hate this sh--
it's like... if someone else was in my position; i'd tell them that it's o k and things will get better again... and sometimes if it's a lengthy depression, i'd tell them "yo or yoette, it's been a long time, long time... sometimes it's stupid to be sad over something stupid or something a long time ago"... but hey... vvhatever

i don't ask for much...

... but when i do, it' something big ...

... but i dont' ask for much


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 2:19 AM [+] ::
...

saw gissel and nikita...
kris olsen and jeff oderlin...

in other crap... i've been going on-line more often than usual... as the days go on i miss my car more and more... i mean... the first few days, i've been o k... i've accepted... but i guess this cycle is going backwards cuz now i'm gettin' sadder and depressingererer...

also, too many people know about this blog, but it's not like a lot of u read anything anyways... nor do i write much specifics any more... nor have i ever written anything specific Approx. last year...

as much as i don't want to tell anyone, but i do...
so here's to those who read my blog:
y is it me who has to be in a car crash and have no ONE to massage my back...
i've said it before, and i'll say it again... there's a difference between family's love, friend's love, and one's love...
sure, i'm complete in 2 out of 3, but it's not complete as a whole...

picky, i am
others r too
what shall i do
wait or leave
my thoughts of you

it's never easy as it is
a perfectionist, i suffer
flowers of algernon
i knew from the beginning
that the end is dreary
i mustn't think much
lest forever be weary...


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 1:58 AM [+] ::
...

c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 4:46 PM [+] ::
...

so what were u doing June 7th, 2005 at Approx. 11:50AM???

there's good news and bad news...
the past few weeks have really been grand, for the most part...
i'm not bothered by work... saw 2 bosco guys... the joseph elementary school girl recognized me... i saw the man with the camera and Cane Man... a kid asked me if he wanted to ask me a hard question: Spell: "ONOMATOPOEIA" and he was suprised that i spelled it correctly :P... saw Jullien, and Patricia... i got the BATMAN BEGINS poster for free...
i got the classes i wanted, it's just that i'm still lazy with my school work and i already dropped my english class...

so my agenda for yesterday was to go to Economics, sell my english books, buy my ticket, go to my sister's house, eat my leftover quiznos, go home, shower, then go to Irvine...
but instead, my sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend was supposed to wake me up by calling in the morning... she called me late, so i decided not to go to class... actually i did decide to go so i went to school... THEN i decided get a refund for my english class because i dropped it that morning... Joe "Atheist" is in that classs (no, he's not an atheist, i just don't know how to spell his last name)... then i decided not to go to class and go to Cathedral City... 91E, 60E, 10E, 111S, left on Cathedral Canyon Drive, right on Lalo Guerroro...
y Cathedral City??? well, it's the only Imax theater that's playing a midnight showing of BATMAN BEGINS... so i find the place after 2 hours driving and i buy my $10 ticket for BATMAN BEGINS the midnight showing!!! and on my way back on the 10W, around 11:50ish AM, i'm going 70-75mph cuz the speed limit is 70, and i'm on the far left lane (#1); no car pool lane... i hit a couple of bumps on my left tires, and realized those r too high of bumps to be the tiny road bumps... i started veering to the left and into the bushes and shrub... O crap, ya'know?... so i tried to turn right to go back to the road... BUT SOMETHING (i think some sort of branch stuck in the back right tire) made me lose control and turn right 90 degrees across traffic... i tried turning left but i knew it was too late so i braced myself... and WTFreaks-in-a-mythologies did i say when i was out of control??? i blurted out loud, "Oh, God, No"... i didn't hit any cars but i spun and hit a curb at the edge of the shoulder lane... which made me fly off the into a small ditch below... i put my arms in the air really far back so i felt the roof of my car... i hit a metal wall (which i kewlly damaged, by the way), and skidded down the ditch... the car landed on its passenger side and i'm facing the other way of traffic... all the glass is broken out except the windshield and the whole car is either gone or scratched... the plastic cover (with the Mazda symbol; underneath the engine door, it covers the engine itself) of the engine even went out... the trunk door openned... after the WHOLE ordeal and getting a ride to the junkyard i salvaged what i could and these r the following things i could remember that i couldn't find:

-The bigger Eeyore (he wasn't wearing his seatbelt) :`(
-The novel, BATMAN Knightfall by Dennis O'niel
-A plastic bag of coins which has to be at least 15 bux...
-5 CDs: 2xBoA, Slipknot, Josh Groban, Fate's Own... and i think Meteora
-The breast cancer ribbon on my left shoe...
-and all 3 license plates... the BAT symbol and the whole bumper was gone... BATMA17 was bent and stuck on the trunk door... and the BATMA17 that was in the front dashboard; well, i saw the tow truck driver put it in my car, but i couldn't find it afterwards :-/
-and May's hairclip... i'm sorry May!!!

all the monopoly boxes opened and i salvaged what i could find, i don't know what's missing in there... the Cutco box opened (the entertainment pack) but i think i found all four knives... anyway...

my injuries include a sprained left ankle, a bruised left bicep (now i know what purple looks like! ^_^), and my neck is really really sore now... my sister picked me up after a 2 hour drive... (it's kinda likea crazy shiznets cuz in '00, she got in a solo crash 10 days before her birthday too!!! *whispers: 10 days)... then she brought me back home, +2 hour drive cuz of traffic... on the way home, i asked my sister, "so who would replace as Magnolia's partner for your wedding?"... we bought and ate McDonalds and reported my car to insurance... went to the Memorial Hospital around 4ish? and stayed there til 10PM... and that's all i remember or feel like typing as of now...

i have video of the after wreckage cuz my cousin's camera flew out of the car... and i recorded it...

have u ever wondered what happend to that person that "dropped" the class... ya'know, what if they didnt' drop it, and they just croaked... or ur friends and family that u haven't heard in a long time... u think they're anti-social or real busy with their own life, but in fact they've been dead for a long time?... what happens if ur friend or family died... would u go down the list in their phone and call each person up? how long would it have been until u knew i was dead??? how do u think u would've found out, if u EVER found out??? who knows wear danger lurks...

so now i'm thinking, y did i say "o God No"? i have no purpose except saving the world... cuz for without the world, there is no music, dance, love and all that jazz... some things i can live with painless pain... :-P
what if i'm like anakin skywalker and i'm supposed to be bad... (but then he became good at the end... but ya'know vvhateveR)

i've said it before since my first crash and i'll say it again: SEATBELTS!!! :-P

so yeah, June 17 is still on at the BLOCK!!! but no more $5 movie... i'm thinking of buying a bicycle, but i hate wearing helmets, maybe i'll leave the world with a bicycle and no helmet...... or i'll just start saving up for my own place and a car... or not ya'know vvhatever... is that selfish??? GOOD cuz this is for all u people who think i'm a DoorMAT!!!(uh-huh i'm talking to UUU!!!) MOO HAR HAR!!! HA!!!

now for the bad news... i have nothing/no one to take me to watch BATMAN BEGINS for June 15; 12:01AM showing in Cathedral City... :-j
buy yeah ya'know vvhatever...

and for the second bad news, sh-- fu--ing dominic and cuddle girl! u got to make out in MY CAR and i never had the chance to!!! >_<


c-ya:-)


-j

:: j 12:32 PM [+] ::
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